Hello? Hello? Hey, can anyone hear me?
It's dark, and I can't see you. Down here in the rut. Hello?
What is this thing on my head? *yank* Oh! A gallon-sized ice cream box! Well, I've heard that lactic acid is a good skin softener.
Oh! I'm in a rut! Where's the wagon? OH MY...hey! There it is. It's waiting for me. I wonder if I've got any wet-wipes to get this ice cream off my face before I get back on.
The best I can figure is that the wagon hit a very large bump, and I flew off the back, through a grocery store, and somehow all the ice cream flew out of the container in midair, and then it landed on my head when I fell in this rut. Yes. That is exactly what happened.
Of course, that doesn't explain the kettle corn kernals that were in my bra. Someone else must have eaten a torso-sized bag of kettle corn at the fireworks last night. And then they tripped, and somehow those kernals flew into my cleveage. Yes. Exactly.
See, I knew there was an explanation. Because otherwise, I would have to admit that I've been on a three-day non-healthy bender, with the occasional salad, and I suck and waaaaaaaaaaaaa!
I'm never going to be a teen model if I keep this up. My month of motivation is still on, and I'm just going to strike these last days from my memory and get with the program. Again. And again and again and again. Because apparently, I can't just be all disciplined and regimented.
I've just slaughtered 20 minutes of Power Yoga, and I'll be doing my jog-walking thing in a bit. I'm back on the wagon. I'm laying down, covered with ice cream and popcorn, but I'm on it.
New contest coming up - I'll announce it later this afternoon... check back, mmkay?