On Being Discouraged

Well, here I am again, feeling blue because I can't seem to get any forward momentum going.

I chalk it up to the strange summer lack-of-schedule that we've settled into, the busy work I've had going, and a general burnt-out feeling when it comes to my weight.

It isn't changing.  It hasn't changed in a month.  I'm not really trying at this point.  And it makes me feel...tired.  Tired of thinking about it.  Tired of wanting to wake up and be 30 pounds down, magically.  Tired of waiting to see results, and aside from more muscles in my legs, I've got nothing to brag about.
Well, except for my hair.  My hair is cute.  And I've got a nice rack.  And I did score a cute dress for 20 dollah.  But I mean, aside from those things. 

Hello!  My name is Jenny, and I'm a big friggin' whiny non-loser.  And I want to smack myself.  But that would take more self-interest than I can muster right now.

I'm thinking I need to follow a plan.  A real plan, not a make it up as you go, change the rules to include whatever the hell sounds good right now plan.  I know that I'm very sensitive to sugars.  I know what foods I SHOULD be eating.  I know what rules I should be following.  But knowing and doing are two different things right now, and I'm angry about it.  Even my subliminal listening thingies, which had me all excited, seem to be losing their power.

It all boils down to time for me.  I have to be willing to take the time to think about feeding myself.  The exercising has become automatic.  But the food...any menu I plan I seem to immediately deviate from.  Any line in the sand becomes an irresistible naughty desire.  I am totally discouraged.

Talk to me.  Give me some ideas.

Comments

[vickie]

Have you ever tried the points plan on Weight Watchers? You can do it online and don't have to attend their meetings. Or you can go to their meetings for the accountability.

[adey]

if you're at the pool with the kids try something like this.
http://www.prevention.com/article/0,5778,s1-2-171-742-5447-1,00.html i'd mix in jogging between each one to keep your heart rate up

[fat Bridesmaid]

maybe put away the scale for a week or so? That way the number won't torture you? Or try a new activity -- like belly dancing or spinning? I hear variety is the spice of life...

[SheilaC]

No great advice, just lots of sympathy... hang in there! I think you've been doing so MANY good things for yourself and your family this year. Try to celebrate your successes! Maybe just pick one nutrition choice to work on each week, and grow more good habits, one step at a time?

[Healthy Mummy]

I agree with Sheila, pick one thing to do and stick with that. Maybe since sugar is your weak point cut that out. I know when I can get a hold on the sugar thing, everything follows. Keep your chin up.

[MelissaLBC]

It's hard Jenny. Really, really hard. But if you give up, the odds are you'll gain 30 pounds instead of lose it. Have you talked with your doctor at all? I had a heart to heart with mine a few months ago about my weight loss (or lack thereof) and it has really helped.

[Missy]

You are being too hard on yourself. You need to stop. You are expecting perfection and nobody can take that. You just wrote that you were trying to give up too much and now you've overwhelmed yourself. Step back and give yourself a break or you'll rebel and stop trying at all. We don't expect you to be perfect, Jenny. Don't expect perfection from yourself. Reading about your struggles and your humanness is what keeps us coming back, because we are all just the same that way. I have the advantage of perspective (in your life, not mine, of course) and I can see you are trying to hard. You've lost nearly 15 pounds and exercise is now "automatic." Think about what hurdles you've crossed! You are not a failure. You are a raging success, okay? You're BigSlice, you're kickass, and you're doing all the right things. Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming, la da da de da ...

[Tracy]

Hi~ I just found your blog about a week ago...I love the title! I agree with the last couple of writters...you are having a bad day/week AND you have done so much right for yourself. I think your kickass and I love your virtual model, I'm at 167 and don't look anything like your cute model. Do they have a model cellulite and strech marks? Hang in there...you really are taking the right steps! Peace~Love~Free~ Tracy

[prov31wisemom]

boo hoo from me too! How ironic that I came here on my major down day, lookind for a pick-me-up! (At least you know you're not alone in this boat!=) Anyway...I don't think a new plan will enevitably help any more than other plan/scheme you've used over the last year or more. You know what to do...sadly, the only thing left is to do it the best you can when you can, and try to forgive yourself when you don't live up to it all.

[Cammy]

I just found your blog and apparently just in the nick of time! *G* I do love what others have said about giving yourself a break. The fact that you're exercising for yourself is a huge deal. For what it's worth, I've been using http://www.sparkpeople.com (username choices4me) for a little over a month, and I love the nutrition tracking function. Like you, I don't follow a specific diet plan, and this tracking function helps me keep up with what I've eaten. I put it all in there--the good, the bad, and the--well, I haven't had an 'ugly' so far. But I'd put it in there if I did! Honest.

Hang in there. You'll get back on track soon; I'm sure of it.

Cammy, who doesn't know you but is sure you'll do fine anyway

[jo-less]

Hi, I find that sometimes I can't deal with a long term strategy so I just make each decision as it comes along... What shall I have for lunch? Should I eat that chocolate bar? What shall I do in the gym? If I make more good decisions than bad ones then I'm winnning plus I don't have the pressure of a whole lifestyle to stay on top of. I find I can usually make a single good decision and then forget about it, making the next one easier to make correctly too. If that makes any sense... :-) Good luck anyway, and just forget about the whole 'diet' for a while, concentrate on the next meal and the next decision.